Look closely at your enemies....
'They' say that each person you choose to have around you will teach you something. Traits of these people are mirrored in yourself. What you see in your friends, for example, the things you love about them, or the things that you dislike are traits that you have as well.
If you react to something that someone says or does and label them controlling, you are recognizing the controlling tendencies in you. If you find them to be loving and generous, you can claim these qualities, as well. Everything is mirrored back at you.
Others reflect parts of your own consciousness back to you, giving you an opportunity to really see yourself, which will ultimately help you to grow.
The qualities you admire or dislike in others are your own
So, if you feel that someone is treating you badly, in actuality they are showing you who you are. This leaves no room for blame, judgement, or even forgiveness but simply the realization that you have received a gift of knowing, understanding and love. And it puts the onus right back on you.
It is up to you to be the change.
You cannot change anyone else's behaviour, you can only work on yourself. If someone is insulting, intimidating, or disrespecting you, it is not in your power to make a difference in them. See yourself in their behaviour, and choose to work on that. At the same time, take a look at the most loving, kind, and compassionate people in your life, and know ... that is you also.
Honour yourself, in all your frailties, honour the lesson, and be grateful for the awareness to even notice there is a lesson.