#315

Holding grudges, judging others, hating, wanting to cause harm, withholding forgiveness, gossiping, ridiculing, ignoring others, withholding mercy, throwing stones, 

STOP IT.

This hasn't even scratched the surface of the behaviours that we need to seriously rethink. All of us... think about it.

We all have been guilty of judgement, gossiping and throwing stones at some time in our lives. It appears to be human nature, a little chest pounding. It is not necessary to put someone down in order to build yourself up, but it happens nonetheless. Some of these behaviours smack of bullying, others are abusive. They are all unacceptable.

These are all negative behaviours, therefore, fear based. This is in no way an excuse, no one wants to put up with bad behaviour. A person that is not fear-based is less likely to act this way or have any need for the ego boost. 

"Love is the absence of judgement." Dali Lama 

Anyhow, despite all that may be said, these types of behaviours really do need to stop. It is a decision that everyone must make for themselves. It serves NO ONE to engage in this conduct, it only serves to appease the ego.

"Just because your pain is understandable doesn't mean your behaviour is acceptable." Dr. Steve Maraboli

#314

We can control our lives by controlling our perceptions.
Dr. Bruce Lipton

Perception: 

a way of regarding, understanding, or interpreting something; a mental impression.

We all know that when ten people see the exact same event, there will be ten different versions of what actually transpired. They were all looking at the same thing, but it depends on what you SEE. 

"We don't see the world as it is, we see it as we are." Anais Nin

"It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see. 
- Henry David Thoreau

What you see can depend on a multitude of underlying issues, emotions, and circumstances. It's about exactly 'where you are' at the time, you put your own spin on it. You see things as you are, no one is the same, so versions vary. 

Our perception of an event or situation will be determined by our background and experiences. Expanding your horizons, will expand your point of view. If your ego has been running your show, by simply admitting that there may be another version of a story could change everything for you.  

Think of a situation that has caused you grief... take an honest evaluation of how it 'went down', consider the part you played and how you reacted to the other person. Just admitting what might be a flaw in your perception, can sometimes lead to a healing.

Just be open to the possibility that things are not always as they seem. Life is not in black and white. There is always another version of the story.

#313

Every moment one lives is different from the other. The good, the bad, hardship, the joy, the tragedy, love, and happiness are interwoven into one single indescribable whole that is called life. You cannot separate the good from the bad. And perhaps there is no need to do so either.

Jacqueline Kennedy 

Our experiences compose our story, they make us who we are. We are able to rewrite our story any time we choose. 

We can rewrite our story, but we cannot rewrite the past. We can't change anything that has already happened, but we are certainly able to make it easier to digest.  We need to take a look at the issues we have accumulated and rid ourselves of the burden. Eliminate the 'bad' times and concentrate on the ones that bring us joy. Whatever happened, happened. It created fear, sadness, or resentment in you.

There is no way to change the facts, but you can change your reaction. Nothing is to be gained by continuing to resent the people that hurt you. Forgiveness will make your life much easier, it will allow you the freedom to live your life. It is a choice. Of course you wish your past life could have been different, happy and joyful at all times, but it wasn't. This is a fact, it wasn't marvelous, but here you are, you did all and lived to tell about it. 

It is now up to you to make your story happy and joyful for yourself and those in your tribe. Don't give any credence to the 'bad' parts, instead direct your attention to all that is good.  You write your own story, you are holding the pen, write whatever you want....decide what you want it to look like and make it so. 

#312

"And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music." Friedrich Nietzche

This is the way it is, anything different, anything out of your realm of possibility or normalcy is dismissed as being outlandish, insane or even certifiable. It is just too far out to even be considered as something a sane person would contemplate, and therefore not worth your attention.

This is true of many things.... if someone ventures too far from the conventional path, dancing to their own drum, it seems to evoke criticism and judgement from the masses. Why is that? What is so scary about someone doing something different or being a free-thinking individual? We are not sheep.

We each have different feelings, attitudes, talents, experiences, and social/ethnic backgrounds.  We are each on our own path and the non-conformists have a reason for being, as everyone else. Perhaps their purpose is to show us enjoyment or fulfillment. When you are doing what you WANT to do, life flows more smoothly, stress is lessened and you will reap the benefits with your health and well-being.  

Also, it really isn't up to anyone else how you run your life. No rigid thinker has a firmer grasp on life than you do. Life is not about schedules and spreadsheets, you are here to experience, not stagnate. 

It takes courage to go against the grain, to be all that you can be when so many are against your self-expression. Stand firm and be yourself. 

If you are one of the lucky ones that can hear the music, I hope you dance.

#311

"Holding on to anything is like holding your breath. You will suffocate. The only way to get anything in the physical universe is by letting go of it. Let go and it will be yours forever." Deepak Chopra

We all have baggage, you don't reach adulthood without some junk in the trunk (you know what I mean.) You can tell by your reactions to different situations, that there is STILL work to be done. 

Even though you feel that you have done certain issues to death, there is always more work required. The truth is you are NEVER done. That's the whole point, there is always more to learn. 

We are here to learn and grow and it's not over until it's over. Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know. So it is very beneficial to dig around within and get those issues to the surface.

Once we are aware of what issues we need to work on, we can attempt to let them go. You don't want them festering inside, manifesting into illness. You really do want to discover what makes you tick, acknowledge the feelings,  and allow yourself  the privilege of release. It is a process, it takes work, to free all the pent up anger, resentment and hurt. But the only way to get what you want, is to let it go. 

It isn't easy.... it takes time. It often feels like it'll never end, but it will if you are diligent in regaining possession of yourself. You don't want to let issues hold you back, you have places to go and people to see. When you finally let go something better will come along.

Everything I've let go of has claw marks on it.

#310

I'm not sure where the path will lead. But I'm sure glad you have walked with me for a few steps.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. It is no accident that they do. 

They are here to test you, teach you, use you, love you or bring out the best in you. They have a mission, just as you do. We all affect those around us in some way.

"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning." Catherine Aird

As you progress on your journey, you may, for example, encounter a truly negative person. They too, have a lesson for you and you WILL end up being grateful. It is always hard to imagine that you could possibly be thankful for the time spent with someone of this nature; but once you absorb it all, you realize what it was all about and that you have learned a valuable lesson.

None of us is really sure where our path will ultimately lead us, but at each turn,
we need to thank those that sustain us; our families, friends, co-workers, and even complete strangers; everyone who has contributed to our lives. We are who we are because of where we have been and who has been there with us.

"Important encounters are planned by the souls long before the bodies see each other." Paulo Coelho

#309

Forgiveness: is a process of giving up the old for something new. Old experiences and memories that we hold on to in anger, resentment, shame, or guilt cloud our spirit mind. The truth is, everything that has happened had to happen. it was a growth experience. There was something you needed to know or learn. If  you stay angry, hurt, afraid, ashamed, or guilty, you miss the lesson. You will be stuck in a cloud of pain. Iyanla Vanzant

Forgiving someone is more for you than for them. Your life will not progress if you are locked up in resentment, fear and/or revenge. The thing to remember is that you are not forgiving the offense, nor condoning what they have done; you are preventing their behaviour from destroying you. The act of forgiveness will allow you to move forward. You cannot change what has happened but for your well being it is the best decision.

"Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." Buddha

"Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness. You do not gloss over or deny the seriousness of an offense against you. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offenses. Though forgiveness can help repair a damaged relationship, it doesn’t obligate you to reconcile with the person who harmed you, or release them from legal accountability." greatergood.berkeley.edu

"The act of forgiveness takes place in our own mind. It really has nothing to do with the other person." Louise Hay

#308

If you want to awaken all of humanity, then awaken all of yourself.

If you want to eliminate the suffering in the world, then eliminate all that is dark and negative in yourself.

Truly, the greatest gift you have to give is that of your own self- transformation.

Lao Tzu

When you are told that you can change the world, it is absolutely true. You, being the change you want to see, will also work. It all starts with us, nothing is separate, we are all one. Each person makes a difference. We need to be responsible for our personal healing, so we can slow down, create deeper love connections to each other and to our land. If we show respect, love and compassion for other living things and the land, they will show respect for us.

We need to get to the point where we stop seeing the earth and ourselves as broken. 

The earth will react to us as a species, therefore if we start to heal ourselves, she will respond to the healing. We need to rid ourselves of all that is dark and negative within.

We are all an integral of the whole.

The Law of Divine Oneness - Everything is connected to everything else. What we think, say, do and believe will have a corresponding effect on others and the universe around us. 

#307

When you say or do anything to please, get, keep, influence, or control anyone or anything, fear is the cause and pain is the result. Byron Katie

This is manipulation. 

We know that a person has their own agenda when they resort to using some form of manipulation. There is a predetermined result in mind that will benefit the manipulator.

Psychological manipulation is a type of social influence that aims to change the perception or behavior of others through underhanded, deceptive, or abusive tactics.

This person wants something from you, and they use different methods to get it. They may start out with flattery, move on to badgering and usually end up demanding and/or bullying you into submission. 

"We may appear to be mean, but we are really only frightened." 
Byron Katie

There is fear behind their actions, all the negative attitudes are fueled by fear, and they all result in pain. They approach you in this manner because they are frightened.  Someone with no agenda would just directly and politely state their intention. There would be no game playing, simply an honest exchange. 

"Life begins where fear ends" OSHO

#306
Don't take life so seriously. It's not like you're going to get out alive.

This is a quote I was raised with. My Dad said it a tad differently... "Don't take life too seriously you won't get out alive anyway." It's the same message. Having Kermit give it to you may take away from the seriousness of the quote. By serious, I mean, don't take on the weighty thoughts of life, don't get wrapped up in the drama. Life is meant to be a celebration, an adventure, not a sober, somber affair.

I know that many of you think that life IS serious, there are obligations and responsibilities. You need to be mature and prudent, watch your back and think things through. Yes, you can do that, be on your toes at all times, with a 'buyer beware' attitude. Do your due diligence, I'm sure you'll save yourself from many unforeseen problems. But with this attitude, it may turn out to be a long, tedious existence.

I feel that if you are that uptight about your life and how you navigate it, you must be up to your ears in fears. How can you possibly be present and alive when you are busy planning how to circumnavigate the next impending disaster? Where is the enjoyment when you are looking over your shoulder for imminent danger?

If you had a little faith in yourself, it would be unnecessary to be so scared. If you see the world as a scary place, it will be. Don't look for trouble, because coincidently, if you see the world as a loving place, it will be.

If you are firmly grounded in faith, whatever your belief system, you don't automatically download all the information you hear/see regarding this scary world. The lesson remains the same, do your inner work. Find out what keeps fear alive within you, and work on letting it go. Bad things will always happen, just as good things will. You need to KNOW that you will be OK no matter which way things go and then just dive into life. LIVE it.

There is not security for those who seek it outside of themselves" 
Byron Katie

#305

Nothing binds you except your thoughts.

Nothing limits you except your fears.

Nothing controls you except your beliefs.

Do you notice that all the things holding you back are coming from you? They are not the government, religion or other people.... they are all you. This is wonderful because the only person you can actually change is you. Life's biggest limitations are the ones you make in your mind.

Change your thoughts and change your life.

We often jump to conclusions about all kinds of different scenarios, getting ourselves all worked up, negativity abounding, and what for? Flying off the handle about someone's opinion is a waste of time. If that opinion is different from yours, who cares? Do you always have to be right? A person's opinion is simply that, an opinion. It is not necessarily fact or truth, it is how they feel about something. You don't feel that way, so what? What are you trying to prove but getting so riled up?
Your thoughts, fears or beliefs have come into play and are running the show. They are stopping you from interacting with others; you are simply reacting to some button being pushed. They are holding you back.

This requires a change in mindset...which requires taking a look at what it is that gets you worked up. When your thoughts, fears and beliefs come to the surface, they need to be addressed. You can address them as you keep calm with your mouth closed. Keep it to yourself, but recognize the issue, face it and let it go. YOU are in charge. It all begins and ends in your mind. Whatever you give power to has power over you, if you allow it.

#304

In life we do things. Some we wish we had never done. Some we wish we could replay a million times in our heads. But they all make us who we are....

We wouldn't be the same person without our life experiences, good or bad. They are all leading us to where we need to be. There is no shame in making 'mistakes', it's all part of the process.

And since the process allows for 'mistakes' ...... are 'mistakes' even a reality? Is there such a thing as a 'mistake?' There are no 'mistakes'. Everything is a lesson, you may go down the perceived 'wrong' road, but that is exactly where you are supposed to be, it is all part of your journey.

Everyone is exactly where they are supposed to be.

If we were to reverse anything that has happened in our lives, we wouldn't be who we are or where we are today. The purpose of this life is to LIVE it, in whatever way you choose. Everyone is on a journey, doing it in their own way. 

Live your life, smell the coffee AND the roses. Quit worrying about whether or not you are doing it right. Don't second guess yourself. You are doing your life, precisely how you are meant to be doing it. You are the perfect person to do your life!

Do those things that you've always wanted to do, live your dreams, take risks, you are here to experience, learn and grow. Playing it safe, holding back, and/or hiding out, are not living your life. Life is a gift, accept it.

#303

Accept the fact that some people didn't intend to let you down. Their best is just less than you expected. Thema Davis 

"Expectation is the root of all heartache" William Shakespeare

When you set expectations on those you are connected to, especially those you love, you may be seeing something that isn't there. You have certain beliefs that you feel are the right way to behave. You assume that those in your circles have the same ideals. You are seeing them as you want them to be, not as they are. 

When someone oversteps your bounds, you are disappointed and let down. You feel betrayed and hurt. You expected them to have your back and they didn't. They said they loved you, but didn't act like it. They embarrassed you in front of your peers. You thought you could trust them and they let you down.

If someone doesn't live up to your expectations, the onus is you. It has to be. You set up the expectation. A person can only be who they are, they will always be that person. Just because you want them to act in a certain manner, doesn't make it so. You are setting yourself up for disappointment if you are trying to change someone. 

In most cases, people do not set out to hurt you, they are just being themselves. You fantasized that they were something they were not. The only person you can change is YOU.  The expectations that you put on others are often unrealistic. You are projecting a want, need or desire on someone else to fulfill.  No one can fulfill these for you, no one can 'save' you, that you need to do for yourself. They are, after all, YOUR wants, needs and desires.

Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket.

#302

Now, THIS, is how to live your life!

Nowhere does it mention.... be more responsible, get your priorities straight, or even get your ducks in a row. Achieve, reach, attain, win, earn... Go, Go, Go.

Set your goals, your long range plans, make sure everything is neat and tidy, organized, be prepared and ready. Keep your eyes on the prize, be in it to win it.

Enough!! Let go of what doesn't make you happy...

Once you reach adulthood, none of this is necessary. It's just another example of someone else trying to run YOUR show. Oh, I know, you have to be responsible, you have obligations....more rules. The rules will keep you in line, you will walk the straight and narrow, and you will die with your music still in you. No one, on their death bed, ever said that they wish they had spent more time at work. They only regret the things that they didn't do or see. You only have so much time, you are wasting your chances to have a life. You are here to be happy and live your life to the fullest. 
Happiness is a choice. 
No one can make that choice but you. 
All it takes is a change of attitude.... 

"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." Dr. Wayne Dyer

You will never find peace within yourself, unless you make the choice to be happy. It doesn't matter what is going on around you, just decide to be happy. Then go out and do everything mentioned above. 

Strive to be happy.

#301

If you're always racing to the next moment, what happens to the you're in?

Enjoy the ride!

Isn't that the way it goes? We have too much on our plate, too many oars in the water, too many friends and family that need us. Doesn't it feel good to be so important and in demand? You may have moments of gratitude that you are needed, but mainly, isn't it exhausting? 

If you are running around taking care of everyone and everything, who is taking care of you? You are giving yourself away and missing YOUR life. You are also missing the point.

Life is not a race, it is meant to be enjoyed and celebrated. This is your life, for YOU.... it is meant as a human experience in which you will learn and grow. But in order to really have this experience you need to be present in the moment. You don't see/feel/touch/smell or hear much of anything when you are running to and fro. You are missing everything, life isn't meant to be a struggle.

If you are obsessing about everything, you are accomplishing nothing.

There is no glory in being so stressed. Stress doesn't mean that you work harder or care more; in fact, it usually means you want more attention. Of course you do, you have been giving it to the world, but, again, what about you? 

The attention you need can only come from you... you need to give yourself the loving care you crave, the care that you give to everything and everyone else. You are your own life partner, you will be with yourself until the end. You can count on that. So take care of yourself, slow down and enjoy the ride!

#300

Don't be so hard on yourself for not having it together all the time, for not knowing all the answers.....

You don't need to know all the answers and it's a wonder so many felt that they HAD to have an answer for everything. There is absolutely no way you could possibly know what the future holds or why  things happened as they did in your past. We can surmise or guess, but really... we don't know. 
If you think about it...how could you know all the answers? Don't beat yourself up because you didn't 'see it coming' or 'you should have known'. 
You didn't. Period! 
It was a lesson, learning from the lesson is the path to freedom. Then let it go. 

We have no control over other people and most circumstances. So how could we know anything for sure. Life goes on and we need to figure out how we can go along with it. 

Life has a natural, organic flow, like summer sliding into fall. It doesn't need your input or string pulling, it just does it. Control is an illusion. Slow down and enjoy the ride. 

Stop rushing around trying to fulfill some impossible agenda, unrealistic goal, keeping everybody happy. You are setting yourself up for failure, or at least what feels like failure. You cannot be the 'be all and end all' all the time. You deserve much more than that.

Life is a journey, not a race.

#299

If you will let your dominant intention be to revise and improve the content or the story you tell every day of your life, it is our absolute promise to you that your life will become the ever improving story. For by the powerful Law of Attraction - the essence of that which is like unto itself is drawn - it must be!

Law of Attraction: Demonstrates how we create the things, events and people that come into our lives. Our thoughts, feelings, words and actions produce energies which, in turn attract like energies. 

Negative energies attract negative energies and positive energies attract positive energies.

So if you spend the majority of your day worrying and fretting, complaining and criticizing, you can expect more things to worry, fret, complain about. But, as always, you have a choice. 

Now I'm going to tell you to think only happy thoughts, which sound entirely wacko, when you are consumed with worry. So, why not try this? Worrying is just wasting time. You can control your thoughts. So if worry rears it's ugly head, switch the channel. Direct your mind to the happiest day of your life. How did that day make you feel? Sink into that thought, the feeling of joy or love. Feel it, and as you do, you'll start to send out a happy vibration. Like the rat in the maze, you can condition your mind to eliminate the worry thoughts and settle on the joy. 

Think about what you love not what you hate.

#298

"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored that to anything on which it is poured." Mark Twain

ANGER: a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility.

Anger is a normal emotion with a wide range of intensity, from mild irritation and frustration to rage. It is a reaction to a perceived threat to ourselves, our loved ones, our property, our self-image, or some part of our identity. Anger is a warning bell that tells us that something is wrong.- pbs.org

Anger is a natural emotion, it's similar to a growl from a dog, a warning. It is stating that you are opposed to whatever is going on. You need to release the anger in some manner, not aggressively toward another person, but perhaps something physical to relieve the pressure. If you are unable to handle it calmly, remove yourself, go for a walk or a run, until you are calm enough to address it. 

Do not push it down and try to ignore it, it will fester and eventually manifest into illness. Express yourself, just be sure to be kind, state your point of view, forgive, and let it go.

There is a difference between anger and rage. Uncontrolled rage, name calling, abuse; emotion, verbal or physical, are not acceptable, ever. 

Anger is only one letter short of Danger

#297

Awareness is all about restoring your freedom to choose what you want instead of what your past imposes on you. Deepak Chopra

You are a free agent...free to choose all details of your life, all your highs and lows and even your thoughts. To be in complete charge of what you are doing and where you are going will require some changes.

Change usually starts with your mind. You have been programmed for certain responses; governed by your past, life experiences and ego. 

The ultimate aim of the ego is not to SEE something, but to BE something.

The ego isn't so willing for you to open up and see life differently. The ego would rather be right than be happy.

"The moment you become aware of the ego in you, it is strictly speaking no longer the ego, but just an old, conditioned mind pattern. Ego implies unawareness. Awareness and Ego cannot coexist."

Eckhart Tolle

Awareness will allow you to notice your response triggers, to intercept them and finally change them. You have a choice to live from your heart or from your ego.  So, live for today, leave yesterday and tomorrow alone, today is the only time you have....try to enjoy it.

#296

Every choice we make creates an experience....take note. When we choose from fear, we become exhausted. When we choose from love, we experience joy, peace and 'flow'. We are free agents always... we decide how to play the game.

Pat Bley

Life IS a game. It is your choice how you play it, just as mentioned in this quote. If you are choosing to do anything from fear there will be problems... this is not your true self. Fear is the manifestation of something from your indoctrination as a child,  or something you have heard/read.  You have taken this information on as truth and it is distressing when it is challenged. It causes worry, stress and exhaustion. Fear is a choice.

So, why choose fear? Is it really a choice? Yes, it is. There is always a choice, and you are in control of your reaction. It may not feel as though you are actually given a choice because the reaction is so swift. It's a knee-jerk reaction. The feeling is 'there' and you are reacting, usually before you have had a chance to think about it.  

So, STOP, right where you are, right in the middle of your reaction, and acknowledge the feeling. Once you allow the feeling, and face it for what it is, you have something to work with. Now you can decide if this reaction, this fear, is valid at this point in your life. You are no longer a child, and yet your reaction, most likely, is something you have carried since that time. If you can figure out what you are dealing with, chances are you can  switch your reactions, one at a time. Releasing your fears will make it so much easier to navigate your world. 

Recognize and Release.

And now, next time, you can choose joy, peace and flow. You are a free agent.