#528

'What is' has no bearing on what is coming unless you are continually regurgitating the story of what is. By thinking and speaking more of how you really want your life to be, you allow what you are currently living to be the jumping-off place for so much more. But if you speak predominantly of 'what is', then you still jump off - but you jump off into more of the same. 

Maybe the life you are leading is not all that great, certainly not what you aspired to or dreamed of, and you probably feel like you've just about had enough of going nowhere. You are consumed with thoughts of defeat and it seems to come up in every conversation. Whatever is causing this collapse that is controlling your reality is getting far too much attention.  It may feel very critical to you, and therefore you can justify the obsession but, in fact, it only gets worse. If you feel it is critical, it will be critical and will result in manifesting 'more of the same.'

That's your life as it stands today, this is the 'what is' of your existence. I know, you don't want it to remain that way. Go back to your dreams and aspirations, how did you want your life to look? Keep that image at the forefront of your mind...by thinking and speaking more how your really want your life to be, you allow what you are currently living to be the jumping off place for so much more.' 

If this isn't the life you want, YOU can change it, in fact, ONLY YOU can change it. Stop focusing on the bad stuff, it will pass, think of what you want, wallow in what you want. Keep all the good stuff in the forefront. You are the creator of your life, it can be whatever you want it to be, so let it be the perfect life for you.

#527

I'm not here to fix anything

I'm here for the FUN!!!

You are not here to fix anything

because nothing is broken, but everything is continually changing and expanding. Release your struggle, and seek joy and fun, and in doing so, you will align with the fantastic expanding rhythm of the Universe.

Abraham

Life was never meant to be a struggle. Stuart Wilde

We have created all the stress and strife for ourselves. We worry unnecessarily about inconsequential things that happen in our day. We cling to past mistakes and wounds. We allow others' opinions to incapacitate us, we take their words as truth and wallow in the injustice of it all. We carry resentment, revenge, anger and pain around with us, interrupting and/or disturbing our peace. This is STRUGGLE. It is not necessary, 'release the struggle and seek joy and fun.'

Do you need a change? Does any of this make sense to you?

You could ask yourself how it serves you to hang on to despair from the past. It only keeps you attached to whoever wronged you. You are worth more, you have come this far, you have overcome; so be proud. You don't have to prove anything to anyone and you don't need to try so hard. 

Get outside, enjoy the view, find things that make you feel good, laugh, sing, dance, have fun, experience life.  

"Move in the direction of expecting good things to come to you." Abraham 

#526

It is natural for you to be absolutely well

It is natural for you to be abundant

It is natural for you to feel good.

It is natural for you to feel clarity

Abraham-Hicks

There is no reason for you to have anything 'wrong' with you and no reason you shouldn't have everything you have ever wanted. Absolutely!

Everything that is malfunctioning in your life, whether it is your health, your wealth, or your happiness, can be traced to your inner well-being. If you are carrying anger, resentment, or anything that attributes to stress, it will affect your health.

If you don't feel good, if you don't have enough money, nothing is going your way, and you're not exactly clear as to what the problem is or what you are to do about it, then.....

"You don't even have to know specifically what you are wanting. You can be so general you can say, 'I want magnificent success! I want abundance to flow unto me, and I want the process to come.' And if you will say that enthusiastically, and mean it, you cannot miss." 

Abraham-Hicks

"It's as easy to create a castle as a button. It's just a matter of whether you're focused on a castle ...... or a button." Abraham-Hicks

Go back to your natural state, be well, be abundant, feel good and you will feel clarity.

#525

"My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being normal is not necessarily a virtue?

It rather denotes a lack of courage."

Aunt Frances, Practical Magic

"Be yourself, everyone else is already taken."  Oscar Wilde

Your work, here on earth, is to just be who you really are, whether you think you are normal or otherwise. There is a reason why you are as you are, you have an assignment that only you can complete. Therefore, trying to hide your real self will make things more challenging than necessary.

Many people find it hard to be authentic, they conceal the parts of themselves that they don't feel live up to what is expected. This is one of the main lessons of life.... You don't have to live up to anyone's expectations. You are a free agent in the Universe, you are who you are, and all that is required is for you to honour and love yourself.

If you happen to be one of the lucky ones that are on the lower end of the 'normal' scale, you are way ahead of the game. You probably have been fighting your whole life to be able to step out of 'normal', and as an adult, you can finally own it. You see things differently which allows you to be more open to new ideas and uncommon ways of navigating your life.

It takes courage to be yourself, to be different, and authentic. Good fortune on your journey, and never forget, it's the journey, not the destination.

#524

You are a result of your thoughts. If there is nothing else you learn on this planet, you will learn that this is the rule in this reality and the rule of many other realities. 

Thought creates experience. Why not give yourself a gift and begin to think of yourself in a capacity that is exceptional, magnificent and uplifting; free yourselves from the need to have the rest of society agree with you. Validate yourselves. 

Barbara Marcin

You are what you think you are. 

You have created this person filled with doubt, distrust, and  self-esteem issues. Your experiences kicked started the feelings, but you took on the negativity and ran with it. As an adult, it has to be up to you to decide how you want to live your life. It is a choice, if you want things to go your way, you need to send out positive vibrations so that you will receive more positivity. 

If you want to be happy, then be happy.

Other people may appear to validate you, make you feel better for awhile, but, ultimately, it will be up to you. You are in charge,  so ditch the negative feelings and "think of yourself in a capacity that exceptional, magnificent and uplifting." 

Continue this until you believe it, this is your authentic self - magnificent. 

Use it as your mantra, build yourself up and be free from the need to have others authenticate you. Validate yourself.

#523

You've got to say no to the things that don't honour you. No to the things that don't bring you joy. And you don't have to explain your no.

Iyanla Vanzant

How often do you say YES to things that you really do not want to do? Things that you feel you HAVE to do, that you think are your responsibility or maybe you think it's just the right thing to do.

Someone asks you to do something and you feel a  'that feeling' in the pit of your stomach....you don't want to do it. BUT how do you say no?  After some deliberation, you decide it wouldn't hurt you to do this one thing for this person. 

The fact is, it would hurt you, because it's a lie. It's a lie because you don't want to do it. 

How can you do someone a favour, when you don't want to do what they asked? That is not an act of charity, charity comes from the heart. This is an obligation and being obliged often leads to resentment. If you don't don't feel comfortable about it, it just doesn't feel right, if you have too much on your plate, or this person has overstepped, then don't do it.

You don't have to justify yourself to anyone, if you don't want to, you don't want to; and NO means NO. Just say NO, without explanation, just NO.

#522

"Your opinion is your opinion, your perception is your perception. 

Do not confuse them with 'facts' or 'truths.'

-John Moore

We all have opinions on a lot of subjects and situations, and most of us probably feel that our opinion is justified. Of course, you think it's right, it is your opinion, what you have always believed to be true.

OPINION: a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge. PERCEPTION: a way of regarding, understanding, or interpreting something; a mental impression

Many of our opinions are formed during our childhood, others through our adult experiences. Until challenged, most people don't dissect their beliefs or perceptions, they are usually merely an instinctive response. 

Do not confuse them with 'facts' or 'truths.'

If you closely examine your belief system, you may find that that your point of view is no longer valid for life today. Feel free to change your mind. 

Just because you have had these convictions for a long time, does not mean you have to stick with them. You can eliminate any of them at any time to make room for new ideas to filter in. Take a look and see what you can see.

#521

Your work is not to MAKE IT HAPPEN,

your work is to LET IT HAPPEN. 

And you let it happy by POSSIBILITY THINKING, not NEGATIVE THINKING, by HOPEFUL THINKING, not DOUBTFUL THINKING... by BELIEVING IT WILL COME, rather than DOUBTING IT WILL COME...

By talking yourself into FEELING GOOD!

Abraham

Your work is not to MAKE it happen.... Many generations have been raised on the premise that this is what you had to do. 'If you work hard, you'll reap the rewards.' 'Get out there and make it happen.' This, of course, encouraged the 'nose to the grindstone' mentality we know so well. I, certainly, was raised with this outlook, but when push came to shove, I came to the realization that what I really needed to do was get out of my own way and allow things to just happen. I had to stop trying to control everything and LET things happen as they were meant to. Que sera, sera, what will be will be.

You may have found by now that pushing yourself doesn't always get the job done. Sometimes, the harder you push, the 'behindier' you get. Don't focus on what you need to get accomplished, just acknowledge what you want, and allow it to happen. Then BELIEVE it will come to you.

AND IT WILL! 

#520

"Effort is not your friend!

Effort is what you do when you don't Believe.

You try to use

your effort

and your action

and your hours

and your hard work

and your stamina

and your grit

and your determination

To cover up energy that's misaligned.

CUT IT OUT!"

Abraham-Hicks

This is how it goes, isn't it? Something goes 'wrong' in your world and it seems to create a series of undesirable circumstances that quickly spiral into an insurmountable hurdle that ultimately guarantees that nothing will ever go right. 

You have manifested a chain of events that keeps you on this course. No matter how hard you try, no matter how creative your solutions, no matter how much effort you exert, everything continues to go downhill. 

What exactly is the problem?

The problem is that you are concentrating solely on what is wrong, and putting in more time, more effort, and determination to fix it. You aren't seeing life for what it is, a sequence ups and downs. All that effort you are putting forth is not going to solve anything. You are misaligned, creating more of what you don't want. You simply need to believe that these times are lessons for your growth. They will pass. Leave it alone, trust. Allow the Universe to do its job. Everything will work out if you get yourself out of the way.

 #519

People may call what happens at midlife 'a crisis', but it's not. It's an unraveling, a time when you feel a desperate pull to live the life you want to live; not the one you're supposed to live. The unraveling is a time when you are challenged by the Universe to let go of who you think you are supposed to be and to embrace who you are.  Brene Brown

To let go of who you think you are, who you are supposed to be AND embrace who you REALLY are. 

This is the state that most of us have finally reached.... it's the time where we are able to be who we are meant to be. The time where we are letting go of all the expectations of others and self, all the restrictions that we put on ourselves that have held us back. We've reassessed and re-evaluated our belief systems and taken a deep look inside to discover exactly who we are and what we are meant to be doing.

Do you know what you are meant to be doing? There is only one thing you need to do. Find your way back to love. Once you have an understanding, an appreciation, and love for yourself, you will instinctively pass that love on to everything and everyone around you.

"There is no more reason, or less reason for us than there is for anything else. Except to ourselves, we are no more or no less special than any other aspect of the Universe." Bob Miller

#518 

How would your life be different If you learned to let go of things that have already let go of you? From Relationships long gone to old grudges, to regrets, to all to all the 'could've' and 'should've' to the dead friendships you still hang on to... Free yourself from the burden of a past you cannot change.

The quote says: "free yourself from the burdens of a past you cannot change." This is your life today, and you cannot change where it is right now. Although from today onward you can go any direction you want.

The quote gives us a message..... to learn to let go of things that have already let go of us. We all hang on so tightly, give it one more chance, give it the benefit of the doubt, don't want hurt feelings. We never want to take that first step into change. 

We can always justify our actions, in a multitude of ways, until things pile up and we  break. It is usually a very small moment that finally kicks us into overdrive, but actually, it's the "build up" of everything that creates  the "final straw."

So you end the relationship, the toxic friendships, let go of all the negative attachments, and then what? Now you have the regrets, the resentments and everything you should have done/said and didn't, to deal with. You will go over and over every situation that led to the break up and analyze it to death. STOP! You stayed exactly as long as you needed to. You were immersed in a lesson. This is the process,  you will hang on to all of it until you don't, until you are absolutely ready to let it go.

You are not just floating around here with no anchor and no direction. Everything will happen when the time is right. If you haven't detached yourself from some relationship, then the time is not right. It is not over until it's over, and you will do what you need to do, when you are ready to do it. We keep thinking that we "should" do this or that, and you will, if that is what needs to be done.... when you are ready. No matter how a situation turns out, it is how it was meant to be, you learned something from it. You cannot force things to work out in a particular way. 

There is no point in thinking about how your life would be different, if you had done something else, because, you did NOT do something else.  There are no mistakes.... everything will happen as it is meant to. Go with the flow, let the current take you downstream instead of struggling to go upstream.

#517

Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world.

Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.

I have often said, I should have stopped when I was twenty-one and knew everything, because I tell you, I don't know much now.  

All those great conversations we had about everything.. we knew all the answers, we could fix the world. We were so large and in charge. Of course, I was a child of the universe, of the sixties, we were all about the love and the whole world was entitled to our opinion. We protested everything, even sang protest songs at every hootenanny. We were amazing!

Then what happened? Life.... Dating, marriage, childbirth, different jobs, divorce, deaths, etc. normal events, but each and every one caused me to question my beliefs and all those things that I thought I knew. AND I ended up realizing that I know very little. 

I know the main "stuff", like I cannot change anyone, I can't fix them, I can't have everything I want, the whole world does not revolve around me, I am not an island, life is about change, and quit trying to control everything, AND I am not in charge of the entire universe.... shocker! 

So this whole life is about change, and I can't change anyone, so who does that leave... ME! Now that is what I am in the process of doing, changing myself. Quite a new experience to concentrate solely on me, and I am certainly not easy to change. It is an uphill battle, believe me, but the freedom of only having me on the agenda is quite amazing.

Therefore the wise part of this little epistle is: the only one you can change is yourself. If something bothers you about someone else, you need to change your approach or leave. If you don't like the situation, walk away. If you don't want to do something, then don't do it. Don't continue to try and get "them " to see reason, or understand you. Don't explain and don't complain, just shut the door. That is the wisdom of the ages. You are in charge of you, you are the light, let it shine.... 
Repeat of an earlier blog

#516

The Authentic Self...

Authenticity comes when all else is gone, all the masks, all the armour, and all the games. 

We all have some form of defense. Somewhere deep inside, there is something worth protecting; we are all vulnerable at some level. Until we can remove the mask, stop the games and put a chink in that armour, we are not living our authentic life. 

If you haven’t looked inside, you haven’t even touched on what needs to be dealt with. Not only will you not be living your authentic life, but your issues will manifest themselves into something else, like disease. When fear is running your world or you are holding onto resentments, anger, unhappiness or pain, this is a signal that you have 'stuff' to deal with. Obviously, there are a plethora of issues that accumulate within, but if you don’t deal with them, or with life, you will pay the price. You are here to learn and grow, not sit and stew. So whatever you are hoarding inside, whatever deep, dark secrets you don’t want to look at, they are keeping you from being real.

Self-awareness is the key. 

Start by listening to your own inner wisdom or intuition, that little voice inside you. Living in your head will be telling you how you should act or what you should do. Actually, as soon as anyone mentions what you should do, stop listening. Only you know what to do. Trust your intuition.

Try to look at things with an open mind, no judgement. Work on this... people are who they are and they do what they do, just be you, and do your thing, don't worry about the others.

Take a look at your belief system.... clean out everything that no longer serves you.

Take one step at a time.... it's not the destination, it's the journey.

#515

Give yourself a break
Give yourself the benefit of the doubt
Lighten up
Be easier
Go slower
Take it easy
Have more fun
Love yourself more
Appreciate more

ALL IS WELL.

YOU CAN'T GET IT WRONG.

YOU NEVER GET IT DONE.

Abraham-Hicks

The lesson is simple, be kind to yourself, forgive yourself, love yourself

You are important, as important as all the other people you are caring for. Put yourself on the list too. So many of us are too hard on ourselves, we expect perfection. Life is never meant to be a struggle, don't make it one. 

To fulfill your personal mission, you just need to be yourself. That is how  the Universal Plan is orchestrated.  You are a significant piece of the plan and only YOU are the right shape and size to fill that slot.  Take it easy on yourself, you have been walking the path of learning. Everything you have gone through has led you to where you are today. Each step you take is for a reason, there are no mistakes. 

Slow down, lighten up, have some fun and work on love and appreciation.

You were born to be REAL, not PERFECT.

#514

He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.

Albert Einstein

Are you looking at your world, at all the natural beauty available to you? Actually, the more important question is, are you seeing it? 

Everyone gets caught up in the traffic, the dishes, the groceries, and misses the sunset, and even the rain. 

We are like robots, our daily story sounds like a 5-year-old, 'I got up, I went to school, I came home, I went to bed'. There is much, much more all around you. 'I don't have time', really doesn't cut it. 'I don't have time' is an excuse, it's a matter of priorities. If you want to take time, there is time. You have the same 24 hours as everyone else.

There is more to life than work. Everything on the agenda seems to pertain to work. Whether it is the actual job, or dinner, house cleaning, doing the dishes, doing errands, it's all toting and fetching. What has happened to family time? Or date night? Or anytime at all to simply enjoy your life and your surroundings. Two weeks a year, although better than nothing...do not a life make. Neither does getting your required exercise in the gym. We have the great outdoors, even if you don't have the woods in your locale, there is usually a park somewhere in the vicinity. Or take a drive to the country. Find a place that has grass, trees, flowers, or maybe find a beach. Take a look at the view, breathe some fresh air, doesn't that make you feel better? 

We all seem  to be so locked into our houses, our cars, our phones, TVs, and computers. There is a whole world outside, not requiring electricity, to enjoy. Open your eyes and take it in... 

"I hope you never lose your sense of wonder, You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger. May you never take one single breath for granted." excerpt from I Hope You Dance-Lee Ann Womack

Repeat of #214

#513

Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath....

When you find yourself getting angry over anything at all, it is because a button has been pushed. There is some memory within that hurts, and you lash out.

When you hear of gangs, wars, bullying, violence of any sort, you know there is pain at the heart of the matter. They don't need a weapon, they need a hug. I know that sounds cheesy, but seriously, if you remove pain from the equation, there is no reason to fight. There is no need to have 'power over' someone else. No one would need to tear someone down to build themselves up; they would already feel complete within. 

In a perfect world, right?

It just takes one person to start the ball rolling. When you see anger, try recognizing the pain that person is experiencing. You could make a huge difference in someone's life by your reaction. 

Everyone has massive amounts of baggage and you just don't know what spurred this act of force. Of course, you cannot put yourself in danger, but there is no need to retaliate either. We need more compassion and understanding in our world, more people that don't answer anger with anger. 

There are other ways to deal with things besides allowing yourself to sink to that level. Have some empathy and attempt to defuse the situation in a calm and reasonable manner, if at all possible. If not, just recognize where it is coming from and keep yourself at a safe distance. Just know that the anger, is a sign of other issues and has nothing to do with you, but is coming from the pain within.

"Anyone who is angry is fearful"  Byron Katie

Repeat of #224 

#512 

The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind.....

What Bob Dylan was saying in his song is open to interpretation, for sure, but he did say: how many times does something have to happen before someone notices, and does something about it? The answer to that is: that it's blowin' in the wind, it's elusive, it's "there", all around us, through us, part of us.

We don't always know what to do, what to say, or what is next. We don't know if we are coming or going a great deal of the time and we are always looking for answers. Where are they, how do we know what is what? They say the answers are blowin' in the wind which seems to be a metaphor for they are "out there" in the great beyond; no one knows the answers to life's questions. You can only do what you think is best, you can only try as hard as you can try, you can only see what you see.....until you see more.

This life did not come with a book of instructions. We certainly were given direction, but this didn't always end up looking like we thought it would. There is a time in everyone's life that they are at the end of their rope with no idea whatsoever of what to do next. A life crisis, a spiritual crisis, a financial crisis, a relationship crisis, it doesn't matter, everything is bleak and we just want it all to go away. So what are the answers? Where are the answers?

The answers, my friend are within you. Pay attention to the signs, they are everywhere. Open your senses, listen, there are no coincidences. If you think it means something, it probably does. If it caught your attention, there is a reason for it. Don’t doubt yourself. Be aware, be open to the possibilities. Life was never meant to be a struggle. The universe is open to you and wants to help you on your path.   

The answers are not unattainable if you are searching, tune in. You CAN capture the wind, and the answers are also within your grasp. 

Be still and KNOW.

#511

It's not the load that breaks you down. It's the way you carry it.  S. C.Lewis

We all have burdens to carry, 'you've got your troubles, I've got mine.' The Fortunes

Everyone has gone through rough times, death, divorce, betrayal, accidents, illness, etc. there is no end to what some people have had to endure. 

And yet, have you ever noticed that the ones that carry the largest loads seem to be the kindest, most compassionate and loving of souls? 

Some people seem to melt down when anything unexpected takes place. They don't seem to be able to handle 'life' at all, let alone, a disaster. They simply do not feel safe, lacking trust in themselves and the universe. And there are still others that whine and cry about anything, no matter how trivial. This is an entirely different issue of entitlement which requires taking responsibility for themselves.

If you see the world as a scary place, it will be. If you see the world a peaceful place, it will be.

I have found that when it comes right down to it if the person involved accepts his position in life, that's when healing is allowed in. When the worst case scenario comes to call, this person will be ready to deal with it. Positive outlook and acceptance can make your life a lot easier. Stop fighting 'what is'. All the kicking and screaming will not change the facts, and will only leave you exhausted, unable to fight the good fight. Accept your challenges, it lessens the power they have over you and allows you to live your life, not avoid it.

Everything will be okay in the end, if it isn't okay, it isn't the end.

Re-make of #165

#510 

Have you ever had to do this? Have you had to tell someone that you no longer wish to make room for them on your dance card? 

Sometimes these people have been with you for a very long time. It is not an easy step, but eventually, YOU decide that this relationship no longer serves YOU. This, of course, is IT, this is the answer, this is how you make the decision.... does it serve YOU? Is it a one-sided affair? Are you working yourself into a frenzy trying to keep the status quo, and the other person is merely taking advantage? 

"No one can take advantage of you without your permission"

 Eleanor Roosevelt

This is a large part of taking care of yourself, not letting anyone disturb your peace. If someone is not 'there' for you, you are wasting your time sticking around. They have shown you who they are... believe them. They will only keep it up if you allow it. If they are causing you pain in any way, you don't need to lie down and let them step on your face. 

Once you realize that the relationship has very little to do with you, that the other person is there strictly for their own agenda; then, the decision is quite easy. The actual confrontation may not be so. It is never easy to eliminate long-standing connections. 

You will probably have doubts after the fact, but it is your life, you only have control over what/who you allow in.  One thing for certain, you will be happier without toxic people around you. Your happiness is of utmost importance to you and everyone around you.

Once you learn how to be happy, you won't tolerate being around people who make you feel anything less.