#234

When someone shows you who they really are, don't try to paint a new picture....

Ain't that the truth? 

Why is it that we don't believe it when they TELL you who they are either? Some people come right out and say that they are the wrong people for us, and we giggle and say, "Oh no, you're perfect." 

Why are we trying so hard to keep someone that is doing their best to tell us that they are not worth it? Well the answer to that, my dear, is that we feel we are not worth it. We are either trying our hardest to change them into someone we can tolerate, or turning a blind eye to everything they say or do; in order to convince ourselves that someone loves us. Does that paint a pathetic enough picture? 

This is about you, and how you feel about yourself. If you truly loved yourself, you would not tolerate any disrespect, not even from yourself. Trying so hard to make someone right for you, shows that you do not love and/or respect yourself. 

So, place the emphasis on what needs work, your self-respect. Then accept the fact that people are who they are, you cannot change them; BUT if you find yourself wanting to, they are not right for you. When you get your act together, you will attract the right people, not before. AND watch and listen when someone shows or tells you who they are. Get your ego out of the way, wish them well, and show them the door. Then move forward with your life.

#233

"But love doesn't make things nice. It ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren't here to make things perfect. The snowflake is perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us. We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and die." Moonstruck

This crazy thing called love ... I certainly do not claim to be an expert on love, but in my time I have come up with a few insights. 

I am only able to speak from a women's point of view, coupled with my own research and experience. Women, generally, seem to think that when they find the perfect partner, everything will be ideal. Seeking perfection is a waste of time, it doesn't exist... nobody's perfect. Are you? I know, I know.. what about your soulmate, your other half, the person that will complete you? 

“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake." 
excerpts from Eat, Pray, Love - Elizabeth Gilbert 

Love is not a bed of roses, it is messy, heart rending, and often frustrating. It should not be entered into lightly. You, yourself, need to be a complete person, before anyone will ever fit into your life. Just think about it, you are taking two people, usually of different sexes, different backgrounds, often opposing ideals and expecting them to compromise on major life issues. What you see is what you get, you cannot change anyone, so acceptance is critical.

Of course there is the love thing. If, indeed, you truly love each other, you may be able to work things out.  Realistically, you need to let go of expectations, be patient and kind, treat your loved one as you wish to be treated and be honest. Talk to each other, confide your thoughts and fears. Make time for each other, pay attention, and don't take love for granted. Count your blessings, and realize what an honour it is to share your life with someone you love and who truly loves you... warts and all.

#232

If you want to live the life you came here to live. FEEL into it. Turn off the past. The lessons you learned there are over. Clear that canvas and paint that which you want to see now....

If you want to live the life you came here to live... hmm? Do you know what that life looks like? Do you have any idea what life you came here to live?

The life you have been living until now may not be totally satisfactory, but did you know there were other choices? I didn't get that memo, did you? I didn't come into this world with a list of life options in my little hand. This is the journey, is it not, finding out what you want out of the life you have been given? 

I think these are life's burning questions. Why am I here? What am I supposed to be doing? How can I make my life better? How can I make a difference?Inevitably, there are the fortunate few on earth who seem to have this down to a fine art. They look as though they know exactly what they are doing and where they are going. They probably know what life they came here to live. But where on earth did they get that information. It seems to be a hit and miss proposition at best. People are always questioning themselves, seeking wisdom from psychics, tarot card readers, clergymen, psychologists etc. forever seeking, trying to find out if they are on the right path; if they are going in the right direction and what they are supposed to be doing. 

Doing what feels good for you, seems to be the answer. You will go off in many different directions throughout your life, but eventually you calm down and settle on the path that fits. Life becomes less of a struggle, as you finally step out in the direction that unites your heart and soul.

#231

If there's a secret I could whisper, it would be that IT'S ALL INSIDE YOU ALREADY, every single thing you need....

Absolutely, everything you are looking for... you already have. 

"Oz didn't give nothing to the tin man that he didn't already have." -
America

You don't need to go and sit on a mountain top and contemplate, or pray in a church, mosque or temple; to discover what you want to know. If you are wondering about the purpose of life or why you are here,  you only need to look within. You have all the answers.

It doesn't matter where you are, quiet your mind, and the answers will come. You don't have to wait for anyone to tell you what you want to know, simply connect, any time of the day or night... 24/7

"We cannot teach people anything; we can only help them discover it within themselves." Galileo Galilei

“Do you know what you are?

You are a manuscript of a divine letter.
You are a mirror reflecting a noble face.
This universe is not outside of you.
Look inside yourself;
everything that you want,
you are already that." Rumi

#230

Anger is like flowing water, there is nothing wrong with it as long as you let it flow.
Hate is like stagnant water; anger that you denied yourself the freedom to feel, the freedom to flow; water that you gathered in one place and left to forget. Stagnant water becomes dirty, stinky, disease-ridden, poisonous, deadly; that is your hate. 
On flowing water travels little paper boats; paper boats of forgiveness. Allow yourself to feel anger, allow your waters to flow along with all the paper boats of forgiveness. Be human.

Anger is an emotion, a healthy one, a natural response; and needs to be expressed. Not turned inward or buried; leaving it to fester and create a plethora of other problems. 

If there is an issue that makes you angry, you are usually responding to a button relating to fear, defense or shame. Anger needs to be addressed; either by expressing it or dealing with it (healing the source of the anger) Expressing it is the fastest and easiest solution, but investigating the source is always the answer... it enables you to acknowledge and release.

But for now.... take a deep breathe, and express. I'm not suggesting rage, I am, though, saying... stand up and make your presence known,  let the people in question know that you are opposed to, and affected by this issue. Anger can be stated, it doesn't need to be explosive or revengeful. 

Anger does not go away by itself. 

Anger does need to be dealt with, just like grief, resentment, shame and guilt. It's all part of the journey, it is what you are here to learn.

 #229

You don't drown by falling in the water; you drown by staying there.

People stumble and fall, things don't work out as planned, go awry, and you feel as though you are drowning. As the quote states, you don't drown by falling in the water, but by staying there. 

What you need to do is to pick yourself up again, once you fall. That's it, you will fall, but don't stay down. Give yourself a little time to sort things out, and then get up. You are now free to start again. You cannot let the fall define you. It is just a moment in time. Everyone has fallen at some time and what defines you is how you get back up. Don't beat yourself up or put yourself down. These things happen. There is a lesson to be learned and you will be stronger and wiser because of it.

"You can never hope to pick yourself up if you're always bringing yourself down." Alexa Michalec

Be kind to yourself, every time you fall is another lesson. This is your journey, there will be ups and downs, but it will all be worth it in the end.

“I was set free because my greatest fear had been realized, and I still had a daughter who I adored, and I had an old typewriter and a big idea. And so rock bottom became a solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” – J.K. Rowling

#228

When your energy vibrates at a frequency that is within direct alignment to what the universe has been attempting to deliver your entire life, you begin to live in the flow and true miracles start to happen....

I chose this quote to emphasize what I have been talking about in past blogs. Your thinking is directing the flow or lack of flow in your life. 

If you are a positive thinker, if you can find the joy in everyday life and if you are grateful for what you have, your vibration will rise higher. There are universal laws governing all things. 

The Law of Perpetual Transmutation of Energy states: All persons have within them the power to change the conditions of their lives. Higher vibrations consume and transform lower ones, thus, each of us can change the energies in our lives by understanding the Universal Laws and applying the principles in such a way as to effect change.

YOU have the power! YOU and only YOU can change your life. You could start by practicing gratitude. There is always something to be grateful for, find it and give thanks. Bring joy back into your life. Pay attention to what is going on around you, and start to take note of the wonderful miracles that take place every day. The opening of a flower, the birth of a baby (even a baby bird), the fact that you are able to take a walk, that you can see a sunset. We are blessed, each and every one of us. These things will raise you vibration and, as a result, bring you more of the same. The universe is more than willing to assist you. There has probably been something on it's way to you for some time. Raise you vibration and be ready to receive.

Breathe, Believe, Receive

#227

Let someone love you just the way you are.....

This is what we are all working toward; loving and accepting ourselves completely, in order to allow someone else the privilege of loving us. 

This isn't always so easy, especially for women, who seem to be more critical of their attributes than most men. We pick at the scabs of our real or imagined flaws until we bleed and are still not satisfied. Others really do see the beauty in us, love and accept us, but we are still holding back, unable to believe that there is much to love. 

How can anyone else be expected to love and accept you, overlooking all your perceived imperfections, when you are unable to do it yourself?

"To believe that you must hide all the parts of you that are broken, out of fear that someone else is incapable of loving what is less than perfect, is to believe that sunlight is incapable of entering a broken window and illuminating a dark room." Marc Hack

Other people see in you something they feel is missing in themselves, and they admire you for it. Whereas, you may be focusing on whatever you find unacceptable. They don't 'see' any of what you think you see. They love you, and don't notice your imperfections, they only see someone they love. 

So, if someone has accepted you for who you are, why are you fighting it? Do you think they are blind? Do you think they are lying? That they have a hidden agenda, or merely a sexual desire? The one thing you don't seem to have thought of is: they love you, just they way you are. They don't want you to be any different, they just want you to be you. You are the light illuminating the dark room for them. Love is love, there is no explaining it, only acceptance. Let someone love you.

#226

Oh sure, you can knock and it will be opened. Seek and it will be found. Ask and it will be answered.

This quote, or a similar version, is found in the bible and in various songs; reminding us that we will be looked after, we are not alone, and all we need to do is ask. 

Everything is available to us, for the asking, knocking or seeking. But as the quote points our our being grateful for what we have right now will bring more of the same our way. If we are thankful for the blessing bestowed upon us, the blessings will compound.

But you could also just say 'thanks' in advance.

Thank you.... that's it.... 
Do you remember, years ago, when Miss Oprah started talking about a gratitude journal, and how this would enhance your life? How having an 'attitude of gratitude' would transform your life for the better? You were to make a list each day of the things you were grateful for and just say thank you.

Just saying thank you is enough. If the only prayer you ever said was 'thank you'.... that is all that is required. Gratitude is the pathway to joy, happiness and abundance. There is no need to be constantly striving, simply be aware of, and acknowledge all that you have.

"In the end, though, maybe we must all give up trying to pay back the people in this world who sustain our lives. In the end, maybe it's wiser to surrender before the miraculous scope of human generosity and to just keep saying thank you, forever and sincerely, for as long as we have voices."  - Elizabeth Gilbert 

#225

Don't seek, don't search, don't ask, don't knock, don't demand... relax. If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it. - Osho

This is so true. We all get tied in knots over some situation, obsessing about it to the nth degree and creating more problems. The fact that we only need to let it go, is something we are all aware of, but that is easier said than done. Just stop thinking about it. Just relax! This is definitely the best advice ever, but really, how easy is it to do that? The only thing I can say is that it does become easier. It seems to be in our DNA to take steps toward a solution, figure it out, and solve whatever problem we have.... it is our responsibility as an adult to make sure we come up with the answers, isn't it? 

Well the truth of the matter is, you only make it worse by worrying about it. It just becomes larger than life, all blown out of proportion. So find something to do.... go for a walk or a run, clean out the junk drawer, make something, bake something, write a book; take your mind off the problem. Think about something else, anything. 

Because what you think about at length, is what you manifest. You are creating it. You are creating the life you are living, and the problems that go along with it. 

"What you think you become" Ralph Waldo Emmerson

You need to change the vibration of your thoughts, things will work out on their own, if you get out of the way. Change the way you handle a problem, look at it, accept it and let it go. Let it go for real, don't take it back and start worrying again; completely and absolutely let it go. Everything will work out as it is meant to. Relax, it will come. 

#224

Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath....

When you find yourself getting angry over anything at all, it is because a button has been pushed. There is some memory within that hurts, and you lash out.

When you hear of gangs, wars, bullying, violence of any sort, you know there is pain at the heart of the matter. They don't need a weapon, they need a hug. I know that sounds cheesy, but seriously, if you remove pain from the equation, there is no reason to fight. There is no need to have 'power over' someone else. No one would need to tear someone down to build themselves up; they would already feel complete within. 

In a perfect world, right?

It just takes one person to start the ball rolling. When you see anger, try recognizing the pain that person is experiencing. You could make a huge difference in someone's life by your reaction. 

Everyone has massive amounts of baggage and you just don't know what spurred this act of force. Of course, you cannot put yourself in danger, but there is no need to retaliate either. We need more compassion and understanding in our world, more people that don't answer anger with anger. 

There are other ways to deal with things besides allowing yourself to sink to that level. Have some empathy and attempt to defuse the situation in a calm and reasonable manner, if at all possible. If not, just recognize where it is coming from and keep yourself at a safe distance. Just know that the anger, is a sign of other issues and has nothing to do with you, but is coming from the pain within.

"Anyone who is angry is fearful"  Byron Katie